Assault Commando: If It Isn't You, Destroy It!

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assault-commando iphone gameOverall, I really like Assault Commando, but I do have one nit to pick.

3D Magic says Assault Commando is set in a South American jungle, but its look seems Asian; Perhaps we're in Peru during the rule of Alberto Fujimori. Even at that, I'm seeing palm trees and huts here, not Japanese pagodas. The graphics actually suggest the jungle of some unnamed southeast Asian land; Hint: it rhymes with "bam." The nice thing is, it doesn't matter.

Whether you're in Asia or an inexplicably Asiatic South America, Assault Commando is an old-school top-down two-stick run n gun with the feel of an arcade game. The reason the setting doesn't matter is that the story is irrelevant. Here's the actual plot: there's this guy that's you. Then there's everything else. You destroy it. Oddly enough, in slogging through said Asian terrain in South America, you are attempting to stop one Albrecht Braun from taking over the world. Don't ask.

Of course, destroying everything that's not you keeps getting more difficult, as you would expect. You have limited ammo, a wide assortment of enemies, and more weapons than you can shake an RPG at. You also get a nice soundtrack to kill by, Openfeint leaderboards to aspire to, and throwaway lines like "another day, another kill" to make you feel like a hardened badass, even if you are in fact a pasty dweeb killing time until the 7W bus comes. The gameplay is smooth, the graphics are Duke Nukem retro chic, and the action is addictive in 360 degrees. Nasties can come at you from anywhere, so you have to have your head on a swivel at all times.

Assault Commando's sound effects add to the game's immersive quality. True, you're only immersed because top-down shooters tap into a violent atavistic bit of the brain only slightly less ancient than the part we share with reptiles. But the sound effects help: the ker-blam of a grenade, the whoosh of a missile, and the rat-a-tat-tat of machine-gun fire are all faithfully reproduced, meaning they sound just like in the movies.

One nice additional twist is that Assault Commando lets you hop in a Humvee or a speedboat sometimes, in case all that firing on the run is playing havoc with your arches. Other than that, this is the time-worn dual-stick shtick done well. Assault Commando is the prototypical easy-to-pick-up, hard-to-put-down, multi-hour time waster. It's not breaking any new ground, other than the pits you open up with ordnance, and it's not in the slightest bit enriching in any way. You are not solving puzzles here, and you are not expressing yourself creatively. You are expressing yourself destructively.

In other words, if you're like me and you like this genre, you'll like Assault Commando.

Watch the Assault Commando Video to see this game in action:

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This app is not currently available in the App Store.

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